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A certain amount of play money could then be put into each person’s wallet. Spenders just like to feel they have control over some money to spend as they please.4. Maybe the problem isn’t that your to-do list is too long. As one of my favorite teachers used to say, “When people know what to do, they don’t get upset. It might help to know there are five ways, and only five ways, to solve it. Getting rid of the partner gets rid of the problem, but it might not be your first choice.2. There just may be some things on that to-do list that will go away if you wait long enough. Wait long enough and the kid will outgrow the shirt. Perhaps funneling a certain amount of money into one account for savings and another account for expenses would ease the anxious partner’s mind. But if the end of the money still comes before the end of the month, all you can do is cope the best you can and encourage each other while you look for ways to increase your income and decrease your outgo. The problem with problems is that they often loom large.
Maybe the problem is that you each use money as a way to communicate control issues. Maybe one or the other of you rebels about the need to budget.
Solutions to these problems are usually situation- or context-specific.
The process starts with problem finding and problem shaping, where the problem is discovered and simplified.
For instance, it is a mental process in psychology and a computerized process in computer science.
There are two different types of problems, ill-defined and well-defined: different approaches are used for each.